You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
Thanks for FaceTime'ing with that ugly chick last night while me and her friend were in the other room. it's good to know I can still count on my wingman even when we're 2000 miles apart
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
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