She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
Randomize
