i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
I answered the door to some Jehovah Witnesses hungover and wearing nothing but a white tshirt. I think they made it the church goal to reform me, we've gotten four pamphlets. My mom's going to make me convert if they keep coming.
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
He couldn't undo my bra. He ended up breaking the clasp he clawed at it so long. We met on Tinder for God sake
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
Randomize
