I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
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