Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
It's an open bar. I'm gonna be gone when you get here.
Text me the address now before you're too drunk to text English.
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
COCAINE IS GR8
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
Randomize
