I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
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