Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Randomize
