my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
Randomize
