I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
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