gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
I hate all girls vehemently.
I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
it was like his penis was on wheels.
so I was like, you know platform 9 3/4? I know something else with those measurements. best. pick up line. ever.
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
Randomize
