Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
I think my moral compass just broke
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
