No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
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