Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
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