Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
Enjoy the penises
rest in peace liver.
It was nice having you occupy space in my body that could be holding beer n chicken.
that's going in my livers obituary.
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
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