Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
Randomize
