you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
He told me they were just razor bumps!
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
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