Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
forgot a fork. i am eating fettucini alfredo with a comb that i rinsed off the the bathroom sink. eating alone in my car. life doesn't get any sadder than this
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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