and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
I know i'm drunk when the "men" sign on the bathroom sounds chinese
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
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