And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
GOOD MORNING! This is your wake up call! Just incase this text wasn't enough, I had sex on your bed last night while you were drunk hitting on my sister. Dan jizzed on your pillow! We rubbed it on both sides! Now get up and go to class!
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
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