Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
Masturbating after my cheeseburger. It's unavoidable.
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
Houston, we have a squirter
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
Randomize
