sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
Randomize
