You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
Randomize
