You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
Randomize
