No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
May the power of my ass compel you!!
... drunk me broke the coffee table?
STOP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON. YOU DID THE THING.
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
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