If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
Randomize
