Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
Randomize
