Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
Randomize
