stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
last night i was so high that when a homeless person asked me for a dollar, i responded: dolla dolla bill ya'll.
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
i totally just wrapped her wedding gift in tin foil. These are the skills 2 bachelor's degrees have given me.
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
I'm going to go ahead and refrain from sexting you in an airport that is currently at a "level orange" security threat.
Randomize
