We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
Randomize
