i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
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