i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
Slut skills are useful in every country.
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
Randomize
