Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
His nipple licking is glorious
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