Where are you?
In a non slutty way
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
While the bouncer was checking my purse, he found a bag of pasta noodles in it and asked me why I put them in my purse. I said to him: "So the guy knows I can cook."
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
Randomize
