what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
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