Im at strip club and am horny
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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