I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
Randomize
