Did you hallucinate the same white buffalo that I did last night.
No, but I did see you shaking hands with a homeless man.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
Pretty sure I just became the first person ever to use the word "boner" in a wedding card...
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
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