i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
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