next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Randomize
