Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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