I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
Just drug him and when he wakes up be like "you just woke up from a coma, we've been married for the past five years." It'll be like the Vow but fucked up.
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
Randomize
