At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
Randomize
