Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
