If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
