We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
Randomize
