they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
Randomize
