Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
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