I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
I had to smuggle a street sign attached to a 14ft long pole out of my house this morning. The list of reasons for me not to drink just keeps getting longer.
Dude what the fuck...
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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