Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
i love discovering the tokens of our drunkenness from the night before. it's like easter egg hunting. today: smashed pizza rolls in the sink.
Randomize
