you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Randomize
